Four tips for managing parent guilt when you have young children

Guilt can show up when you’re answering work emails instead of playing, ordering takeout instead of cooking or simply wishing for five quiet minutes.

Remember, feeling guilty doesn’t mean you’re doing a bad job.

That guilt is often a reflection of how deeply you want to do right by your child.

Here are a few things to keep in mind when guilt bubbles up:

Perfection isn’t the goal. The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that mistakes and difficult emotions are a normal part of parenting. Naming those emotions and frustrations out loud model for your children that perfection is not the goal. Parents, as well as kids, try their best and learn from less desirable outcomes.
Focus on manageable priorities. Turn your attention to what matters the most: connection, safety, routines and warmth. These are the foundations for healthy development.
Remember: You have needs, too. The CDC emphasizes that caring for yourself physically, mentally and emotionally can make it easier to be a positive, loving parent.
When you feel like you’re failing, reframe that you’re doing your best. Some days you have more to give than others. You’re a real person, not a perfect one.

Parenting is not a performance. There will be messy days, screentime days, cereal-for-dinner days — and these days are beautiful ones too.